Choose joy {stop complaining.....you may miss your ride}

I heard a news report yesterday while listening to KLove radio.  The report was on a group of people who volunteered to be in a sleep study.  One group slept much better than another group.  Scientists took both groups, separately, to give them memory tests.  Before the tests were administered, the group that was "sleepy" was convinced by the scientists that they had a quality night sleep.  The sleepy group actually performed better on the tests because they were coached and convinced that they slept great.  They were in a mindset that they weren't tired.  The news report then went on to say that by simply convincing our self towards the positive of a situation can be all we really need.  Negativism, pessimism, and constant complaining can be detrimental to our lives.  These "qualities" rob us of joy. 

For some reason, this simple idea kept playing over and over in my mind.  I am an eternal optimist.  Or at least I like to think that way about myself.  I do believe that I have trained myself to be this way.  I like to see the best in everyone, avoiding conflict at all costs.  Daily, I choose to get out of bed and face the reality that my child is slowly losing her abilities.  My husband, before he goes to work every day, goes into her room to listen that she is indeed, still breathing.  Yet, Jake and I have made the choice that we are not going to let this devastatingly scary and tragic situation rob us of our joy. 

While we were in Disney, I loved people watching!  So much happiness and joy all around.  Lots of people to watch, and lots of situations going on.  I overheard a lot of conversations.  It's hard not to, especially when you are on the monorail or a bus.  One particular, not so happy situation relates a lot to this post.  We had to catch a bus to one of the parks.  The monorail was down, so this was our only option.  People were not happy about this.  The convenience of the monorail is why some people choose to stay at certain resorts.  So we were waiting for the bus, and there was another family on the bench beside us.  The husband was in such a tiffy about the monorail being down, and was reaming the Disney attendant working the stop.  She was kindly explaining to him why the monorail was down, but she assured him they had extra buses working and he would get to the park.  He continued to voice his annoyances, and kept making me feel very uncomfortable and I had nothing to do with the conversation.  His blood pressure was up, his wife was embarrassed, and the attendant was at a loss.  The constant complaining got him nowhere and made the situation worse than it needed to be.  It probably set the tone for their entire day.  We overheard that they were going to the same park we were.  We saw our bus, proceeded to board the bus, looked back and there was the man still sitting on the bench {complaining} and they missed their ride.   

Disappointment is bound to happen.  Tragedy and unwelcome circumstances are a part of life.  I'm not saying people shouldn't voice how they are feeling or give an opinion.  However, I am saying there are things we can't change that are out of our hands.  We can however, manage our feelings in a constructive manner. Do I want this life for Livia, absolutely NOT.  It hurts, everyday it hurts, but complaining about it will only set the tone for misery.  The insight to life that we've been given along with Livia's diagnosis has made this mental statement to me that I feel I need to share with you; life is short, family is everything, joy is all around us but you must choose to want that joy in your life.  When you are able to choose joy, you will be able to LIV moments more fully and with more vibrant life than you could ever imagine.  

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.” 

― Rumi   

“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” 

― Thích Nhất Hạnh